Hey there, amazing mamas!
I had every intention of sharing my top suggestions for a baby registry today, but something unexpected happened that felt too important not to share. I know I’m not alone in this journey, and perhaps my experience might resonate with you.
Upon returning home with my spirited 16-month-old daughter, Sadie, from daycare, she hopped into her little car and eagerly gestured for me to push her around. Now, I found myself in a bit of a pickle: I desperately needed to use the restroom! So, I pushed her car into the house, hoping to make a quick detour to the bathroom. But as I did, Sadie began to whine, insisting she wanted to be pushed outside around the neighborhood. I paused just short of the bathroom, and as I hurried to accommodate my bladder, I could feel the tension rising.
While I sat down on the toilet, Sadie’s whines turned into full-blown protests. “Sadie, I’m going peepee. It’s okay!” I reassured her, trying to keep my patience intact. But then, feeling overwhelmed, I raised my voice, “Sadie, knock it off. You’re going to be okay!”
In that moment, time froze. Sadie looked at me, wide-eyed and confused. Even Brandon, who was on the phone, fell silent. I realized I had lost my cool for the first time, and I felt like the worst mom in the world for raising my voice.
To make matters worse, I didn’t even apologize. I simply helped her back into the car and took her outside, where we enjoyed a leisurely walk around the neighborhood. Sadie happily turned the wheel and honked the horn, completely unaware of the inner turmoil I was feeling.
Later, I opened my parenting book, Hunt, Gather, Parent by Michaeleen Doucleff, and stumbled upon a profound truth: “Getting angry isn’t going to solve your problem. It only stops communication between the child and the mom.” Ugh! It hit me hard. I continued reading and learned that yelling makes parenting even more challenging because it causes children to tune us out. Instead of teaching them to behave, we unintentionally teach them that anger is the solution.
Each time I raised my voice at Sadie, I was modeling a reaction I never intended for her to mimic. The book emphasized that when we manage our emotions, we teach our children a calmer, more composed way to handle their frustrations. It’s a gentle reminder to approach our little ones like we would a butterfly on our shoulder: gently, slowly, and softly.
As I absorbed these insights, a sense of calm washed over me. I realized that I can self-correct and change how I interact with Sadie. I strive to give her the best start in life, and I felt a wave of guilt for letting my emotions take the wheel. But I know I shouldn’t beat myself up too much; we all have our moments.
After our walk, Sadie and I shared a lovely evening filled with laughter and connection. We had dinner together, followed by a fun yoga session where I mostly demonstrated the poses while she tried her best to mimic me. It’s fascinating how her emotions and energy mirror my own.
As our calming yoga session concluded, I picked her up, and she wrapped her little arms around me in a warm embrace. We slow danced together, and in that precious moment, I knew my earlier outburst hadn’t scared her away.
How about you, fellow mamas? How have you handled moments of raising your voice or yelling at your kids? What emotions does that stir within you? Share your thoughts in the comments below!
From Bump 2 Balance 